As you know if you're following my posts here, I'm 47 years old. I'm quirky, sassy, goofy, sometimes cranky & snarky. I also have a couple points of view that fly in the face of what our society tries to dictate regarding age and image. Women especially are overwhelmed with images, articles, tabloids, celebrities, advertising, you name it. We are told we have to look young, lie about our age, cover up the aging process, be a certain size, a certain weight, etc, for us to be considered acceptable, beautiful, desirable....and if we can't achieve that, we are not worthy of acceptance, love, respect or admiration. It is an impossible standard to live up to and a source of anxiety none of us need. I have found in my own life that I have enough things to give me anxiety without adding all of that unrealistic garbage.
Truth is, real people don't come that way. Beautiful people come in all sizes, all shades of color, with wrinkles or without, in all ages. I used to buy into it some when I was younger. I was so shy and insecure growing up that I worried all the time about what I looked like, what other kids thought of me. It was bad enough to be socially crippling. I did not yet understand that those things were not important. I had not yet learned how to be comfortable in my own skin. I always wanted to be more like my sister Maria. She's a wandering soul, a free spirit, completely herself, and I wanted to be her. Of course, I can't be her because I'm not her. But I have more fun with her than any other soul on this planet, and I am so thankful she's my sister.
It took me a very long time to become okay with who I was, who I am. Learning to be comfortable in your own skin and with who you are, is an incredible act of emancipation. Knowing I am loved by God unconditionally and knowing it is okay to be me, is a very humbling and empowering thing, and I learned it late into my current years. So here I am. I am 47, with some small wrinkles and some grey hairs, and I don't care. The number of them have increased prolifically since my mother died. I have not yet, nor do I foresee covering up my grey hairs. Why should I?? I have earned every one of those grey hairs. All that grey hair is proof that I have survived and continue to weather the storms in my life. Persevered through some really rough stuff. These grey hairs are like merit badges but better, because I do not have to go out and buy a sash or a vest, and no ironing or sewing is required. I am just thankful I still have hair, especially when I consider what my children have put me through all these years. They are 21, 19 and 15 now, and it is getting better, even though it is still not easy.
I don't play coy games with my age, either. I am not "29ish." I am not "35 and counting..." I'm 47, and I'm thankful the number keeps going up (so far it has!). Why should I hide that? I am not guaranteed the privilege of growing old; my mother didn't. Do I look 47? That is not for me to say. I have no idea. I also don't worry about it. I am what I am, for better or for worse, and the only One whose opinion matters, loves me anyway. As is. Which is more than enough since He's the One who created me. "I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Joshua 14:8
So, be you, and be the best you can be. "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34
If you have been following my Facebook page the past few months, you may have noticed the posts chronicling my spiritual and fitness journey. You may have also noticed my posts have increased in frequency during the past month or so. Why is that?
Why am I doing this? There are so many reasons, including these:
I used to be that painfully shy girl, practically afraid of her own shadow.
I used to be that quiet girl who got picked on because she didn't know how to stand up for herself.
I used to be that girl who cringed at the thought of being noticed at the same time wanting desperately to be accepted as is.
I used to be that girl no one wanted on their team in gym class activities. The one picked second to last, before the fat girl.
I used to be that girl who was so insecure she worried constantly what others would think if she drew attention to herself in any way.
I used to be that girl who thought something was wrong with her because none of the boys ever liked her back.
I used to be that girl who tried her hardest to be invisible because she didn't think she had anything good to offer the world.
I used to be that girl who was just drifting through life, sometimes treading water, sometimes sinking beneath. But unable to leave the water.
I used to be that girl who thought she was a lousy mother. A lousy wife.
That was who I was growing up. That is who I was for many of the years as a young adult, even during a lot of the time I've been married. Afraid the other shoe would drop. Afraid the good stuff would come to an end and not come back. Afraid to learn who I was and what my purpose was. Afraid to be brave and bold.
THAT WAS THEN. But NOW???!!! Let me tell you!
Thanks to my God, I know I have a purpose and He has a plan for me. He allowed me (and is still allowing me) to go through all the bad stuff so I could be grateful when the good stuff came. There is so much good stuff! I can do nothing apart from Him who strengthens me. I'm an Italian girl, which means I am genetically programmed to feed the people. We love to cook and we love to eat, and we love to show others we love them when we cook for them. It's what we do. So, I'm a cook. I'm a creative soul. I sew and crochet and craft projects. I love to create for others and share that God given gift with people. We are commanded to share our gifts and talents, and I just want to love on everybody!
Thanks to Beachbody, I am healthy, both physically and mentally, and getting stronger every day. I only get to live one life in one body, and now I know how to take care of it. I am never bored and there are workouts of all kinds for all kinds of people. I am brave now and I am bold now, and I am fearless. I learned how to persevere. I've learned how to be happy and content, including knowing I am ALLOWED to be happy and content. I've learned how to be grateful, even on the hardest days. There is always something somewhere in the day to be thankful for.
I am so excited about the changes in me that have both come from the Lord and from Beachbody. The inside and the outside, physical, mental & emotional, and I'm so freakin' grateful for it! That is why I became a Beachbody coach to pay it forward. That is why I'm posting about wanting to help others feel as good as I do, and will continue to post about it. That is why I want you to join me and do this with me! There is no better feeling than to do something you never thought you had in you to do, to overcome something you thought had you beat. Come be brave with me and take the challenge with me! I want to be there for you!!
And there's something else I want you to do. Tell me how I can pray for you. Send me a message here and not only let me know you're ready to be brave with me. Tell me also how I can pray for you. I strongly believe in the power of prayer and it would be my privilege to do that for you!
with love & blessings,
I am enormously blessed to have a close-knit relationship with my 15 year old, and yes, I know what a gift that is! To have a 15 year old who wants to spend time with good ol' mom is a wonderful, joyful thing. Normally, she's all about playing Legend of Zelda or Guitar Hero to unwind, but this afternoon, I had the treat of an opportunity to be gaming with her, and gaming unplugged. Alice had me dig out a deck of cards and we went old school. Today's itinerary was crazy 8's.
It had been a lonnnng time since we played this but I soon realized that my little card shark wasn't so little anymore, but just as hardcore, with the same predictable results for me. Alice is uncanny in somehow knowing just the right suit to call out to make me draw cards, every game. When it comes to cards, diamonds are NOT my best friend at all! It was GAME ON as soon as we dealt the first cards. Before I could blink, she had already won 5 games to my one. Alice has a knack for drawing the 8's and has a good memory for remembering not only what suits have been played, but how many of them. Even recalling what I've played and therefore unlikely to still have in my hand! One of the early games, I drew an 8 after way too many other cards. I actually thought I had a chance to make her draw cards, which from what you can see, I really needed to do since I had enough cards to fan myself. Of course, things didn't go the way I wanted it to. So what happens? I play my 8 on top of the 8 she played, which she then trumps with, you guessed it, another 8, which was also her last card, and she won. I mean, seriously?? It's a good thing this isn't baseball, because at this point, my batting average is bad enough to get me demoted back to A ball. I was foolish enough to complain about the unfairness of her hoarding the 8's in her hand, to which she retorted back "it's called strategy, Mom, and it's fair game." Uh huh. I see how it is.
At this point, my competitive streak (and maybe a little pride) kicked in and I declared to Alice that we needed to play enough games to let me close the gap and make things respectable. Alice proceeded to take out a little notebook and create a tally sheet to document the fun. Now the smack talk is in writing and I am trying to save face. I got lucky enough in the next game to get down to 2 cards, one being an 8. Surely, I've got her now, right? All I have to do is use the 8, call the suit and wait for her to let me play my last card. This played out in my head a lot better than for real, because Alice proceeded to lay down an 8 of her own, and BAM! Game over. Alice wins. Again.. Which brings to mind that there are warnings against pride all through the Scriptures. Humble pie time for mama bear. Time to regroup and re-strategize because that's what I do. Try again and again. Next game, I am in a similar spot, but then I think to myself, I can be clever and outsmart the girl. I lay down the 8 but call out a different suit than what I actually need. It was a gamble that only worked because she randomly had, wait for it. YUP. Yet another 8, and this time she played the suit I needed instead of what I called out. I yell out a little BOOYAH! and gloat until she tells me she could tell I was bluffing because I was too "happy" with the suit I named and I got lucky because she was tired. I guess she'll never take me to Vegas since my poker face apparently sucks.
I got lucky and did manage to narrow the gap to win a few games after all, but when all was said & done, we played 15 games and Alice remains the Crazy 8 queen in our house.
taking a peek back...
I thought for fun that I would dust off some old writing from the blog I used to post. So, here is a re-run from my head in 2011!
MONDAY, APRIL 18, 2011the aliens among usThere has existed for a long time now, the question of are we alone in the universe or are there others out there? Never mind how you feel about how the universe got here, everyone has their own beliefs about that. I'm talking about aliens. Now, I don't mean the grouchy, irritable alien life forms that take over your teenagers' bodies until they reach their early 20's. That is a temporary condition, God willing. I'm also not talking about the muppet-like ones from 80's sitcoms or movies. I'm referring to the ones that have inspired many a book, movie, television show and if you believe in such things, the conspiracy theory connected to our beloved government. I have decided that I do believe we are not alone, but not because I am not allowed to be a tourist in Roswell, NM, or any other restricted secret place. I believe in aliens in far more practical ways, and I believe they come to my house on a regular basis.
How do I know this? I know this for many reasons. For example, I look around my house and find piles of clutter all over the place. I am quite willing to own up to my own clutter but the other clutter? Books, papers, toys, shoes, food messes, trash...all not where it belongs, and it is a great mystery to all who live here. No one knows who made the messes, just that it wasn't them. Hence, I have no other choice than to believe that there is an alien who comes to party when we are all sleeping. I have to give credit, it or they never wake me up, so they could be considered most thoughtful guests, or would be if they cleaned up after themselves. On second thought, anyone who comes to my house to party and doesn't invite me is a rude one, indeed!
I believe our alien friend also has a sock fetish, albeit a somewhat upscale one. It is never the stained, worn out, stretched out or holes in the toes & heels socks that go missing. Oh no. It is usually Chris' good socks that turn up missing; the ones he wears to work. I believe the alien only has one leg, too. It's either that or the alien doesn't believe in matched sets, for it only steals one of each pair that it fancies. I find it hard to believe that I could possibly lose one of so many pairs of socks without help. I may not be the Brady Bunch housekeeper, but I am also not the slovenly wife that you see changing spots with the uppity, super anal-retentive clean freaky one on wifeswap, either.
Our alien must have a superstition or fear of empty containers, too. How else to explain the teaspoon of juice or milk left in the nearly empty container that is constantly found in my refrigerator? Perhaps the alien has a fear of cleaning; after all, everyone knows that if you finish the pitcher of drink or the container of food, you have to then wash it. Our alien does not appear to have working knowledge of trash cans or recycle bins, either. I come down almost daily to find my kitchen counters cluttered up with food wrappers, cereal boxes that need to be flattened and recycled, dirty pans to wash, drinking glasses and plates to be rinsed out for the dishwasher....I am not my children's maid and I sure don't want to clean up after alien parties, either, especially since I was not invited.
I have learned that aliens must have a sense of humor, though. Every time I watch one of my kids run around the house, (usually the boy) frantically searching for some item they "have to have" for school or whatever, since it is impossible for the kids to consider that something can't be found because THEY didn't put it away properly... I find myself thinking, it must therefore, be the fault of our alien, playing hide and seek with their belongings, just to mess with their heads. If I didn't have to hear the yelling and bickering and blaming one another for the missing items, I might find the entire thing completely entertaining. I might even make myself a small bowl of popcorn before I sit and watch the show. I will freely confess, though, that when it is I who is running around like the village idiot while searching for something that I have misplaced, it is not so funny!
One idea that I am kicking around is the thought of leaving a sort of sacrificial offering for our alien friend. Perhaps I can set out before I go to bed one night, a plateful of old socks or some junky snacks and a note proposing that the missing mates to Chris' socks be returned, a barter of sorts. Otherwise, I may have to play hardball and leave out a mop, vacuum and some dish soap instead. If anyone has better ideas, please let me know. Just don't tell me there are no aliens out there because I may just have to drown you in my pile of mismatched socks.
what do you really see?
I put together a little photo collage to illustrate the point that while pictures are worth a thousand words, that's really only true if your eyes can see more than what's on the surface.
The photo in the upper left corner is me from 2008. That was the heaviest I've ever been without being pregnant. About 40 pounds ago. I might appear happy to you, perhaps because my sister was getting married. Now take a look at the photo in the middle of me holding my nephew from 4 years ago. I'm smiling, right? I've lost a lot of weight since that first photo. Happy, right? Or do you see what's behind the smile? I bet you don't unless you saw me in the months preceding it. You don't see the despair, the emptiness, the sadness & pain behind that smile. You might not see me about to hit rock bottom in that photo. Empty on the inside spiritually, underweight, existing on little sleep and a lot of wine. Well on my way into an abyss of darkness.
Now take a look at the other photos. They're from this year. What's different about these? I'm not empty anymore. I'm not alone. I'm actually healthy. I walk with God's saving grace. If not for that, I'd be a divorced alcoholic, maybe with an eating disorder, or worse. Some of the things that created despair in me previously are still in my life but they don't suffocate me anymore. The emptiness is gone. Replaced with a revived marriage and a Savior who never gives up on me. Healing every day on the inside, and my journey is now a fuller one since I decided to heal on the outside, too. So what you see in this year's photos is truth. Jesus is working on my insides and Beachbody is working on my outsides. It's a truth for which I am immensely grateful. Spiritual strength training on the inside and physical strength training on the outside. My strength comes from Him first, and then it comes from working to become stronger and fitter. It's a journey that I will be taking until He gathers me home. If any of you want to take this journey with me, please reach out to me and we'll do this together! Strength and courage in numbers!
"Why spiders? why couldn't it be follow the butterflies?"
Those who know me know I am a huge Harry Potter fan. I've read all the books numerous times, watched all the movies over and over and over again. I love books and love to read. That being said, the other night I was reminded quite vividly of a scene out of the second book, "Harry Potter & the Chamber of Secrets," when I heard my daughter call up the stairs, "MOMMMM! I need you, come quick!" So of course, I went down to our mudroom and there in the corner, I saw the biggest spider I've ever seen in the house. Bigger than a daddy longlegs, smaller than a tarantula, but brown and hideous. Yes, I know, I know. Spiders are one of God's creatures & they have a purpose in His Creation. But I don't like them. They give me the heebie jeebies and scare me some, and if they come into my house & I see them....oh my! The one time I was foolish enough to watch a little of the movie "Arachnophobia," I couldn't sleep for days! My first initial thought was of the scene in the movie where Harry, Ron & Hermione were instructed to "follow the spiders," with Ron behaving very much like I do when I see critters. I did a little double-take, a shudder, backed up a couple feet, and had a very brief internal conversation in my head. "what to do, oh what to do, holy crap that's big..."
Now, I am a sports junkie. I love football, hockey, baseball, basketball, lacrosse....you name it. I grew up with mostly boys in my neighborhood, and spent all 4 years of high school watching the Syracuse University football team practice. Every single afternoon in the fall and spring. So I fell firmly on the side of TOMBOY while growing up. I only played with dolls for about a year, and that came to a crashing halt when my sister got mad at me and gave my Barbie a crew cut. But I am also just enough of a girly girl that I went ahead and did it. Oh yes, I did. I played the MAN CARD. You know what I'm talking about. If you're married and even 1% girly, you know. I didn't marry my guy only because he's cute and tells goofy jokes. I also married him so he could take care of bugs & critters. That's part of his purpose, why he has the testosterone and I've got the estrogen. It preserves balance in the universe. Balance is good.
So I called upstairs. "Uhhh, honey?? Um, we need you down here. Need some help please?! Please?!!" Down the stairs comes Chris. "What's going on?" "Well, you see, over there in the corner, uh, we've got freakin' Aragog or one of his kids." At this point, I was far too busy keeping an eye on our creepy house crasher to notice if Chris rolled his eyes at me or sighed while he went into the other room to get something to take care of the problem. Not that I would have been offended, mind you. If they're bigger than a "no see um," he already knows after nearly 23 years of marriage that he's going to get summoned as nicely as possible. He returns with just tissues in his hand and I am starting to freak out a little, until I notice the large shoe in the other one. This is important, because if my honey gets hurt trying to deal with Aragog, then I won't be able to summon him later for other unwanted guests in the future, and then the worst thing ever will play out. I will be the one who gets dealt the critter card I try so hard to avoid like the queen of spades in Old Maid, which is about as appealing as cleaning up vomit.
I have made a mental note to myself to add this to my list of questions I have for the Lord when I get to heaven. Why, oh why did You allow Noah to accept spiders on the Ark? Why spiders, cockroaches, snakes and mosquitos? Inquiring minds want to know!
Where's your inspiration?
Feeling like you're drifting? In a funk or a rut? I know how all of those feel. I have many times where my life feels automated, on auto-pilot. You know how it is. You get up in the morning, do what you do to get out the door, and go through your day until it's time to go to bed again. Most likely, it's a routine that is very predictable and in some ways, comfortable. (Most of us are creatures of habit.) Until it's not quite what you want anymore, and it's not comfortable anymore, and you want to change it up... not sure what or how to make it happen.
My suggestion is to nod your head. Look up, and then look down. By this, I mean lean on your Creator. For me, this means looking at the skies, giving thanks for the blessings in my life, and opening up to read His Word. I have found so much encouragement in Scripture. I love the Psalms. Reading about struggles, pain, worries, suffering, despair.....we really haven't changed all that much since the Psalms were written. Matthew 11:28-30 is one of my favorites, too. "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light." (NLT) So many days go by where I would love nothing more than to climb on the Lord's lap and just take a nap. Have you noticed that it is nearly impossible to get a nap once you're a grownup? Being an adult is so overrated sometimes!
Looking down means just that, and also around you. In any given moment, you are both smarter than someone and dumber than someone. Which means, everyone can learn something from anyone. We all have something valuable to offer. Most inspiring to me are the very young and the very old. I think about my 8 month old niece and I am in awe. I think about all the things she's learned to do at such a young age so far, and have you ever noticed that there is no QUIT in babies? They learn to sit up and crawl by falling down, and getting up, and falling down & getting up. Babies don't take no for an answer. (well, as toddlers, they might start to, haha!) There is a miniature version of perseverance, determination, and accomplishment to be seen in babies, and who can't be inspired & encouraged by that? I try to remember that when I'm struggling to complete pushups or any other difficult task. I am inspired every day by all the precious preschool kids I get to see and spend time with every week. They teach me things every day and don't even realize it! I also think about old, or should I clarify, OLDER people. I love older people. They are so interesting and have so much more life experience and wisdom to offer. I think of my grandparents, and how blessed I was to grow up living near them. What a precious gift! My mom didn't get to become old but she taught me so much about how to be a respectful, responsible, quality person. There is no price tag to be placed on something that special!
So....my inquiring mind wants to know. What inspires you??? And if you need help finding your inspiration, let me help!!! Talk to me!!
Thank you for joining me here! I created this blog to share my journey and my story, in hopes that it will encourage you, perhaps inspire you and maybe even entertain you. But first, let me introduce myself.
The short version: I'm both a northern girl, raised in Syracuse, NY, and a southern girl, living in NC. I'm married with 3 kids, 2 grown and 1 nearly grown. I love Jesus. I love reading. I love sewing & crocheting. I love cooking. I love helping and encouraging others. I get to love on and teach some really precious preschool kids during the week, and this year I have discovered the joys and freedoms that come from becoming healthier and fitter through clean eating and exercise. So much so that I have now teamed up with the same fantastic people who got me started and encouraged me on my fitness journey, to pay it forward and hopefully help some of you either get started and/or encourage you to persevere on your own journey.
But this is how I got here from there: I used to be a stay at home mom for about 18 years, one of my children being special needs, and the stresses that came from that became overwhelming. I struggled for many years, not only feeling like I failed as a parent, but as a spouse and questioned for a long time, my worth as a person. My family moved multiple times for my husband's job, and as my kids got older, particularly my special needs child, the stress became harder and harder to cope with. I got to a point where I felt dead inside, empty and not even like a real person anymore. I stopped eating because I had no appetite, drank a lot of wine because I needed to feel numb, and barely slept. I lost so much weight that my sisters and my mother all worried about me constantly, and I was too empty inside to pay attention. All I wanted to do was just disappear and start over. I had no faith in anything, believed in nothing, and had no idea that anyone out there thought I mattered in a way that I could understand. But I was wrong. So very wrong. On the way home from a trip to Pittsburgh with my sisters, I was sitting in the Baltimore airport at our gate, waiting for our flight. There were playoff NFL games on the tv screens, and being the sports junkie that I am, I took a seat next to a man in army fatigues to watch. He happened to be playing a facebook game on his laptop that I also played at the time, so we struck up a little conversation and added each other to our gaming list. I had no way of knowing in that moment how important Grant would become in my life.
Fast forward a couple months from that, and I happened to see him online, so I opened a chat window to say hi. I found out that he lived near me, (small world), and from a random comment on my part that I'd stopped believing in anything, he began to speak to me, about the fact that I was not alone, that I did matter, and he spoke truth to me about God's love for me, even inviting me to join him & his family at his church that coming Sunday. I don't remember what made me say yes, but I did, and I went. And I went back the next Sunday, and the next, and the next, and before I knew it, I wasn't feeling quite so empty anymore, although it was not for a few more months that I actually hit rock bottom. During this time, even though I was learning I wasn't completely alone, I was also still in a downward spiral at home, bad enough that I told my husband that I was leaving, that I had nothing left to give, not to him, not to our kids, not to anyone. He didn't want me to leave, and we very slowly tried to piece ourselves back together. He began to attend church with me, although ultimately we decided to try out the church our neighbors attended, and that ended up being the perfect fit. At one point, Grant decided that I needed a big brother, so he decided to "adopt" me, and so that is how our friendship has evolved.....a wonderfully blessed, sibling friendship. He has been a constant source of encouragement to me, prays for me, and inspires me. But it was his surviving a horrible car accident that was the trigger for me discovering for myself a real faith, real belief , real saving grace that sustains me today. He was hit head on by a drunk driver on the wrong side of the highway, and after seeing photos of his car and learning that it was a Bible that prevented a metal beam from the door frame from going through his leg to make him bleed out, I finally realized that God was real and He wanted me to know it, and I finally truly believed it, and that was the day I knew I belonged to Him. There is no way Grant survives that wreck without divine intervention. At the end of that summer in 2011, I was baptized in my new faith.
Since that time, my husband & I found our way back to each other. Nearly 23 years married now. Things are better in a lot of ways at home, but remain frustratingly difficult with our now adult aged special needs child, who is still at home. The Lord called my mother home very unexpectedly, a devastating loss that I am still struggling to process 3 1/2 years later. But I am not empty anymore, and I am not alone. So many blessings have come into my life since I gave my life to Jesus 4 years ago, even with the trials and struggles that remain. I have surrounded myself with people who lift me up and encourage me. I am blessed to have a job that brings me real joy, working with kids at the preschool at our church. I get to share my love of sewing/crafting in summer camps at church. And now I have the blessings that come with working on making my body healthier and stronger through clean eating and working out. I was suffering from constant fatigue and insomnia, often waking up with pain that started in my back and/or hips, and shot down my legs, and unable to get comfortable to sleep. I had my doctor test my blood for everything, and everything came back normal. I didn't know what to do. I'm 47, was this what I had to look forward to, this whole aging thing? But I also started to notice my childhood classmate posting on facebook about how she was getting healthier and stronger through using some of Beachbody's workout programs, and drinking Shakeology, and I wondered if I should check it out. I thought about it for a number of weeks and decided to ask her for more details about it. Even then, it took me a few more weeks before I decided to try it out, and wow, it changed everything for me! I lost a few pounds that had crept back on, but more importantly than that, for the first time in years, I wasn't waking up needing a nap, wasn't tired all day long! Changing how I ate, exercise, and fueling my body with all the nutrients in the Shakeology, has made all the difference. I have energy again, I no longer wake up in the night with pain, and I have this unexpected love of exercising because it feels great to feel stronger. I actually don't mind getting up at 5:30 am during the week, and 6 on weekends. I used to crave junky food and being a couch potato, now I crave working out. Who knew?
That is why I named this blog Faith + Fitness = Freedom. By actively working to grow my faith and my fitness level, I have the freedom to help others, to encourage others, and to share my God-given gifts with others. That is the whole point and that is why I'm teaming up with my classmate and the other amazing people on her team, to be a Beachbody coach and help others find their freedom. If I can do it, anyone can! I will post about my fitness journey, my faith journey, and my creative process, and whatever else strikes my mind. If you're still reading, thank you for sticking with me. I promise not all my posts will be this long! And if anyone can relate to some of my journey/story, I would love to hear about it!
with love & blessings,